Two months in Heaven

Well, last Wednesday we celebrated AJ's 2nd month in Heaven.  It is hard to believe it's been two months already.  Some days it all still feels so fresh.  We went out the the cemetery again and let two message filled balloons go.  We used red ones this time so we could seem them longer.  It was a calm, sunny evening and we watched them float away for a long time.  The kids were kind of excited about it this time.  They started thinking about their messages several days prior.

We also added a little "night light" at his grave site.  I just hate that he doesn't have a marker out at the cemetary yet.  He's in a pretty 'unpopulated' part of the cemetary and there are not too many markers out there.  If it wasn't for the little blue flag that the monument company put out there (and the ring of dead grass from his flowers being out there too long) I don't think I'd be able to find him.  So we added a little solar powered cross.  The headstone should be in place at the end of August or beginning of September.  I can't wait to have something permenant...something with his name on it...something to prove he was real...

I drove by it last night when it was lit up and it is really pretty.  I just wish it was a night light for his room instead of his grave:(   I just can't wait to get to Heaven to see the 'big picture.'  I have been reading lots of books and blogs about stillbirth and grief and someone posted once that it is obvious that the people who say "Time goes too fast" have never lost a child.  For me, everyday that is done, means I am one day closer to meeting my son.  And I just can't wait to meet my son:)